Taking a break from the Caregiving routine - a total time away has shown me that I can feel "normal" again.
Fatigue, sore muscles, and lack of energy led me to believe that there was something seriously wrong in my body. But once I jumped into the ocean, played in the waves, and lay in the warm sand, all the aches, pains and depression dissolved. Faded away. Gone.
Not on the first day, of course.
Kicking off my shoes, I flopped down on the king-sized bed. Memories of all the wonderful vacations we had taken together, washed over me, and I wished with all my heart we could vacation together again.
After a restless night (I find it hard to sleep most nights, worse in hotel rooms), I awoke to the lure of the ocean. After a quick cup of coffee, I ran down to the beach.
Taking a deep breath, I stretched towards the sun. That golden glow permeating my skin; its warmth caressing my face.
"Good morning!" I called to the sky. The waves. The creatures of the deep.
Pulling energy up from the Earth (the sand really), I began.
Drawing strength from my surroundings, I relax.
Ahhhhh - bliss!