Thursday, January 8, 2009

Grow where you're planted

Paperwhites on the left. Grape hyacinths in the middle.
And an amaryllis on the right.

Each one of us grows at a different rate.

We are finally getting some home nursing services.

I say finally, because we never thought we'd need home care.

After all - we can look after ourselves, can't we?

Ahh - but the time has come for me to break open my cocoon - just a crack. I need to see that there still is an outside world. I need to see the ocean.

Hubby cannot stay alone. But I have needs too. And people who also need me.

So now we're in the process of setting up Life Line. And other emergency services for times when I'm not home and the power goes off. Or hubby falls ill.

I think I'm also growing a little.


beckie said...

Wendy, I know this was a difficult decision for you. My heart goes ou to you. But at the same time, I am very proud of your strength. Your last line says so much.

Your bulbs are exciting! What fun to see them grow each day and anticipate their blooms. Your window sill will soon be full of gorgeous flowers. Much nicer to look at than all that snow just beyond the pane!

Take care of are in my thoughts.

Grammy said...

Oh Wendy, I am glad to here you are letting help in. It gives you room to breath. And special people come into your life like angles sent from heaven. They are a blessing. My Thoughts and prayers are always with you. And I send you candle to shine a light. And a big hug. My email is ehsherlock (at) I send it this way so it can not be picked up easy.

Mom2-2goodboys said...

I Can't wait to see those flowers in Bloom. Cute little Dragon too.
(It is a dragon isn't it?)

Good luck with setting up your lifeline. I'm sure with the new additions to your family coming soon, this lifeline will give you and your family peace of mind.

Abba's Girl said...

It's good you will have home health care assistance. You do need to take care of yourself or you will be useless to yourself and those you love.

Looking forward to the pics of the blooms. I love bulbs...paperwhites are about to bloom in my flower bed. I forgot to put tulips in the fridge so I won't have any next month. There is always next year..


Ruth said...

A very good post Wendy. You are looking after both of you when you make the time for yourself that you truly need. I see too many caregivers who have burned themselves out. We take breaks from our children when they are small and this is no different.

Cheryl said...

Dear Wendy.....I am so pleased to hear this.....I have felt for a long time that this is what you needed but it was not my place to mention it.
You are a wonderful and remarkable carer, and you have my utmost repect.

You are so do need your own space and your own time......we all have our needs.....


I love the post and reference to the growth of plants......

Wendy said...

Hi Beckie - thanks for your support. Yes, I can hardly wait for the blooms to come!

Hi Grammy - thank you for your support too. I am happy to have such good friends as you and everyone here!

Hi Mary, yes you are right. I've been feeling torn. I need to be in so many places at once. Looking to our community for help is a big step in the right direction.
It's a seahorse. You can't see the tail, that's why it looks like a dragon (and the colour of course).

Wendy said...

Hi Annette - I can't wait to see your paperwhites! And , yes you do have next year for the other bulbs. With gardening, there's always next year.
I am learning to care for myself too.

Hi Ruth, thanks for your support. Well, I've got news for you - I never took breaks from my children when they were young. Hubby didn't help much (not this hubby, the first one) and I was happiest with my children. I could have used a break now and again, but never thought to ask anyone for help. Maybe this is why it's so difficult now.

Hi Cheryl,
thank you for your kindness. You can suggest anytime you want. I know any and all advice comes straight from your heart.
BTW - I sent you and email a few days ago, but haven't heard. So I think it must have been a different Cheryl. LOL!

Mary said...


You have needs, too. I'm happy for you - that you made a tough decision.

My Mom was sole caregiver for my Dad for seven years and I needed to twist her arm to let me stay with Dad while she roamed the Mall for a few hours. Soon, she realized it was OK...Ok to let someone fill her shoes for a while.


JeanMac said...

Way to go, Wendy. Hope all goes really well and you can relax for your time out! All the best. Jean

Q said...

Dear Wendy,
I am proud of you. This must have been very difficult to do and so needed. I remember setting up Life Line for my Mother. It just had to happen. She was not very happy about it but I could not be with her 24/7. Even though you HAVE been with hubby 24/7 you need to walk and swim and shop and play need to smell the roses and skip a rock across a pond.
You need you time....this will at least let you know help is on the way if he needs it.
We all do bloom at the right time if we allow ourselves to be in the light.
Holding hubby and you in my blessings...maybe there is a fiber group near by?! LOL
Love and light,

Bear Naked said...

Good for you Wendy.
Some little *me* time is just what you need.

Bear((( )))

Morning Glories in Round Rock said...

Dear Wendy, I know that is a really big step for you. I think it is one that will be good for Hubby as well as you. You will have much more to give him and the rest of your family if you have some time away to do things out in the world. Being isolated (too much) is not good for the body or the soul.
Hugs filled with love,

amelia said...

I'm so happy I found your blog and will have to spend some time catching up with your history. It sounds as if you're heading in the right direction though. You have to help yourself first..

Cheryl said...

Hi Wendy.....I have not received an email from must have gone to someone else.......
I can see someone sitting there looking at the screen and frowning........

peppylady said...

A change in one window that they look out does the soul and heart wonders.
Coffee is on.

Wendy said...

Hi Mary, thanks for your story. I do need to let go sometimes too.

Hi JeanMac, thank you. I hope you can too.

Sherry, you have captured the essence of this post. Thank you for your friendship.

white_lilly said...

Your bulbs bring promises of joy, can't wait to see them opened :)

Wendy said...

Hi BearNaked - you got that right! Thanks.

Hi Jenny, you are so right and I've been feeling isolated for a long time.
Hugs to you too!

Hi Amelia - it's taken me a long time to get here. Thanks for popping in.

Hi Cheryl, - guess that's exactly what the other Cheryl is doing! Oh well.

Hi Peppylady, just wait until the blooms come out!

Shammickite said...

We all need to take advantage of help once it's offered. Just like your bulbs, they couldn't grow without your help.

Wendy said...

That's a nice thought - thank you, Shammickite.

Rose said...

Good for you, Wendy. You do need some time for yourself. Although I haven't been directly involved in a situation like this, I've seen friends and family who have been. You will be a better caregiver if you take care of yourself, too.

Your bulbs look wonderful--just the promise of spring we need. The little seahorse shows you haven't lost your sense of humor:)

femail doc said...

I love the bulbs within against snow without. I know what a big step it is to get help in; I think you're growing a lot! What a tough road you're on, I'm glad to be following behind.

Wendy said...

Hi Rose, no I'll never lose my sense of humour, or my playfulness. They keep me sane.
Thanks for stopping by.

Hi Judy,
Oh yeah, it is a big step. We should have taken it quite a while ago. How are you doing?

Carol said...

Wendy...Your posts touch my soul. I cared for my mother for 6 long years. At 88, she's now in Assisted Living. I just couldn't do it all, all by myself. I'm so glad you're getting help. It's for BOTH of you!

Wendy said...

Hi Carol, thanks for your heartfelt comments. Sometimes it takes us a while before we can accept help - or realize that we can't do everything alone.