Friday, January 16, 2009

Living in Joy

So This is Wonderland did a post on Joy.

The essence of her post was that there are two primary emotions that rule our lives. Love and Fear. We choose which one to live by.

When we are angry, anxious, resentful, insecure or worried, we are living in fear and have left love behind. In other words that which is fear cannot be love and that which is love cannot be fear.

To live in love is to embrace life, to make the most of every moment and strive for your dreams. To live in fear is to stop living, stop growing, and stop moving towards your dreams. To live in love is to live in Joy.

My paperwhites beginning to open.

It's obvious in our natural world that flowers choose joy. Have you ever seen a fearful flower?

I was very concerned about my daughter's pregnancy. She is high risk and at her last ultrasound the baby was only 4 lbs. Too little to be born. They were to wait another 4 weeks and re-do the ultrasound. Yesterday was the day.

If the baby had not grown, then my daughter would have to have a C-section done. Baby would be taken to the Neonatal ICU and kept there until he was big enough to be discharged home.

I had visions (nightmares really) of my daughter running from hospital to breastfeed and look after her new-born premie, and then back home to look after her almost 2-year old daughter.

Hard enough, but with Jasmine's medical problems, and this horrible cold weather, it would have been very stressful. I could help some, but I need to stay home with Hubby.
Well, we had good news yesterday.
The ultrasound revealed an almost 6 lbs baby. Good news. He is almost ready to be born. Today is the doctor's visit. We will have more information then.

It's time I stopped choosing fear. I need to take a lesson from my flowers and choose Joy.
* * * * * *
Update on baby Nathan: He will be coming into this world on Tuesday, January 20th. Please hold him in your hearts for a smooth arrival. Thank you everyone.


Cheryl said...

Firstly I am so pleased that the little one is now doing well....what a relief for the whole family.....sending hugs....

Secondly I have learned not live in fear. It took a while, but I have let go. My mother has lived in fear all her life. It saddens me to watch her in that world..... you know I love white flowers......beautiful photograph of a pure bloom....

Have a good weekend Wendy.....

Wendy said...

Hi Cheryl,
Thank you so much for your kind words. It must be hard to watch your mother like that.
I am glad you've found your way out of the shadows.
I know I still have some work to do in this area, but with good blogging friends like you to light the way, it will be a whole lot easier.

Have a good weekend too, Cheryl. I'm glad it's warmed up a bit for you. Enjoy your garden and say hello to the snowdrop faerie for me!

Grammy said...

I am so glad the baby will be ok and Mom too. Your words are so clear. I wish I had the ability to tell a story that makes so much since. I am on the road to recovery and fear has been a big part of my adventure. I try to run past it like running a red light. but some times A cop gets me and makes me feel the pain. I am learning to control the pain. By brain washing my self that I am happy. It works to get me through my days.

amelia said...

Very happy to hear about the baby!!

I don't live in fear but in loathing and I wish I could get past it but all the time the lies keep coming and I find myself hating...

Rose said...

Wendy, I am so happy for you and your family. Worrying about the health of a new baby-to-be is an understandable type of fear. You certainly have a reason to be joyful today!

I am a worrier and a glass half-empty kind of person all too often. It's amazing how much easier life is when you remind yourself to see the joy. That's one reason I enjoy gardening--it brings me joy to see the beauty in everyday things.

Your paperwhites are lovely!

Wendy said...

Aww Grammy, you write well too. Your analogy about the red light and policeman make perfect sense.
Thinking positive really does help to attract more positive vibes.
Love and Light

Wendy said...

Hi Amelia - thanks for your good wishes.
I guess it's hard to get past any negative emotion. Hope things improve.

Hi Rose, I can relate to you. I also turn to the garden to experience joy. When I walk into a garden center in the middle of winter, I just inhale the sweet smells of earth and plants and totally relax.

Mimi said...

Oh Wendy! This post made me so calm. I am glad you can find joy. Hugs for you!

beckie said...

Wendy, how lovely your paper whites are. Looking at them reminds us spring will come. But to see all that snow in the background-brrr!

Finding a way to only see the joy would be wonderful. Unfortunately, life happens and that is not always possible. But we do control how we chose to deal with it. If we, as you are doing, choose joy, life will be much happier and easier. I have a cousin who has cancer. She is the most upbeat person I know-truly happy to be alive. She tells us she has put her life into God's hands and will let him decide what is best for her. She draws great strength from her beliefs and I admire her choices.

I guess what I am trying to say is I am so proud of you for chosing joy. It will not always be easy, but you know now that you have that choice.

Take care, Wendy and welcome that beautiful new grandson for all of us.

peppylady said...

So glad to hear your grandson hung on a little longer.
My oldest son was born premature and was in an Neo Natal (ICU) and he now a health 20 year old.
They do wonderful work.

Coffee is on.

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Congrats, Wendy.. I'm so happy to hear about your upcoming grandson..

Love the white flowers. They look a little like our small daffodils.

Don't know what to think about the post on fear and love... I agree with some of it, but am not sure it's that 'black and white.' Life is much more complex than to put everything in a couple of categories. You had fear this past week--worrying about your grandbaby. That surely was LOVE, wasn't it???? DEEP subject.

Gail said...

Good to hear the baby is well.
We often "borrow trouble" when things like that are on our plate.
My oldest daughter's birthday is Jan 19th.
Everything will be fine.

Q said...

Dear Wendy,
I choose to live in Joy also but sometimes I have concerns....
So happy to know your daughter and grandson are doing okay. I will light a candle for her on Tuesday, the 20th...I will hold her in the light of love.
Your paperwhites look pretty. I love doing the forced bulbs in the winter. Will you plant the bulbs outside this spring? The birds, the blooms and the bugs all bring me so much glad you also have a beauty to lift your spirits.

Abba's Girl said...

Good news indeed. I pray for your daughter and Nathan's health and safe delivery/arrival.

Beautiful paperwhites. I went outside to take pictures of mine today, they were already fading. They must have peaked earlier in the week and I missed them.

Take care and stay warm and filled with love and life.

Kanak Hagjer said...

So glad to know that baby's fine. My love and prayers for the 20th for your daughter and baby Nathan.
Beautiful connection you made between joy and flowers. Those white blooms are beautiful.

Good luck and take care!

Wendy said...

Hi Mimi -thank you. Hugs for you too.

Hi Beckie, thanks for your understanding. As you say, life happens. It's not always easy. Choosing joy is a way for me to let go of the more painful emotions. No, it doesn't always work. But the more energy I devote to Joy the less I am giving to fear.
I truly admire your cousin. She has learned to let go of her pain and fear and accept the path she's on. To be honest I'm not there yet. It helps to share my journey with my blogging friends.
Stay warm.

Wendy said...

Hi Peppy lady - thanks for the support and advice. Glad your son turned out to be strong and healthy.

Hi Betsy, Oh, I know it's a much more complicated world out there. I try to break things down into steps and make things as simple as possible. I also don't agree with all of the "feel good" books out there, but after I read that post, I felt good. Somehow the fear I was feeling lifted.

And - I think the more joy we can spread and share, the better. Imagine dwelling on pain and fear? No, thank you.

Hmmm - Love for my daughter and grandson. Yup. Fear for their safety. Yup.
Maybe love and fear are opposites? I much prefer feeling open, trusting, joy, rather than scary, muscles rigid, helpless fear.
Yes, there is much more to this.
Glad you stopped by.

Wendy said...

Hi Gail, looks like January is a good month at your house too.

Hi Sherry, my blogger friends bring me joy. Thank you for your kindness. Yes, I plant all my bulbs back in the garden. I love to see where they come up. Sometimes the squirrels "move" them.

Hi Anna, thank you for your kind words and prayers. Your paperwhites will bloom once again next year.

Thank you Kanak for your kind words and support.

Mary said...


January 20th is a perfect day for little Nathan to be welcomed into the world. I will indeed pray for his safe arrival for both he and his mother. God is good!

What an awesome post this is. I love your paper whites and your positive attitude.

Keep warm and safe.

Shammickite said...

Your paperwhites are indeed enjoying life, and you are reveling in all the joy that they provide these cold cold days.
I try to live in joy, but sadness and lonliness have been part of my life for a few weeks now. But I will surmount it and become joyful again. It's very hard to be all alone, but I have a wonderful family and great friends who support me and encourage me all the time.

Wendy said...

Hi Mary, thank you so much for dropping in and for your kind support.

Hi Shammickite, they say when one door closes another one opens. The trick is to try and stay joyful until you see that open door. Not easy. I hear you and my heart goes out to you.
Let the love of your family be your support at this difficult time.

JeanMac said...

Wendy, I'm so glad to read the good news! I've been behind on my reading for several days.