Nursing Notes

As I sit and watch Hubby sleeping my thoughts drift back to the days when I was a student nurse - not that long ago. Here is a page from my nursing notes:

Ring Ring
"Come in, dear!"
Ring Ring
"Come in..."
Ring Ring
"Why is nobody there? Oh do come in!"

Nurse (me) walks into the room in the geriatric unit of a Montreal hospital.
"Who's ringing for me?"
Ring Ring
"Oh, Mr. Jones, you can stop ringing now I'm here.
Ring Ring
"Mr. Jones - let me take that call bell from you. Now, what can I do for you?
"Who's there?"
"It's alright, Mrs. Smith. Nobody is at your door.
"Oh, there you are dear, would you like to come in for a cup of tea?"

Nurse(me) leaves Mr. Jones bedside and walks over to Mrs. Smith's bed.
"Mrs. Smith, you are in the hospital. Nobody is at your door." Nurse (me) plumps up pillow and smooths covers.
"Are you alright, Mrs. Smith? Do you need some water?"
It's important to keep older folks hydrated.
"Thank you. Would you like some tea?"
"No, Mrs. Smith. I have work to do. Try and get some rest."
Ring Ring
"Come in!"
"Mr. Jones, you don't need to ring the bell. I'm right here."

This was real. One of the elderly patients - a very sweet old lady, thought she was at home. Every time someone rang the call bell, she thought it was her doorbell.
She could never figure out why nobody came in to visit.

Another hospital, another rotation, another teacher. This one thought she was teaching us "proper vocabulary".
Ms. Prim & Proper Teacher along with 2 nursing students (I was one of them) walk into the room of a patient with a bit of a hearing problem.
"We are going to change your incontinence product".
"What?" says Mrs. B.

A little louder this time :"It's time to change your incontinence product."
"What?" says Mrs. B., cupping her ear with her hand.
"Your incontinence product, your incontinence product!" Ms. Prim & Proper practically shrieks.

A nurse aide was puttering around the room, sorting towels and bed linens. Turning around to face Mrs. B. she said in a loud voice "Yer diaper, yer diaper!"

"Oh," says Mrs. B. "Why didn't you say so in the first place!"